Motorcycle Club » The Motorcycle Rant

Now i have an EXGF

27 posts from 20 voices
About This Topic
  1. Tacgtriwer
    #

    This weekend I found my long term GF screwing around. I ended it. Now Im going to lose my house. No way in the world to do the math to afford that on a single income. I have to get an APT., start everything fresh.
    This sucks. Come to find out I was such a generous guy that I bought her BF a cell phone on my account. I hope that this is all the deeper the lies go.

    Now, at age 41, I have to reenter a dating scene that I have not thought about for 20 years. This feels clumsy as hell.

  2. yohntoe1
    #

    that sucks dude.i feel for ya .i am in a 20 year relationship myself and i would be in the same boat if we split.theres no chance i could afford everything we got going by myself .
    it takes 2 incomes to make it these days .good luck man.

  3. MigejCojode
    #

    Been there lost the t-shirt. Trust me it gets easier, and better. There are many more important things than your pocket book, or even that house you worked so hard for.

    As for his new cell phone, either get it back or phone an refuse to pay the bill, even if it's in his name.

  4. matcruser
    #

    That sucks but it definately gets easier over time. Be glad you're in Pheonix. At least you can get out and ride. It would be very long winter if you were cooped up in cold country dwelling on this crap. GO RIDE, it's theraputic!!!!

  5. quicgmicg
    #

    This weekend I found my long term GF screwing around. I ended it. Now Im going to lose my house. No way in the world to do the math to afford that on a single income. I have to get an APT., start everything fresh. This sucks. Come to find out I was such a generous guy that I bought her BF a cell phone on my account. I hope that this is all the deeper the lies go.Now, at age 41, I have to reenter a dating scene that I have not thought about for 20 years. This feels clumsy as hell.
    Hey man, sorry to hear that. I you need to talk, rant or rave...just email me here and I'll shoot you my cell #.....or if you want to get together for a ride...I'm up for that too.... just drop me a line..... and we'll hook up...

  6. flakkerbhil
    #

    I feel for you. I was there after a 10 year marriage and wouldn't wish it on anyone.

  7. Mondj
    #

    I think a lot of us have been in your shoes, Tacgtriwer. Many years ago my wife of 23 years decided she liked a lawyer she was working for better than me. Luckily my kids were grown but lost my home and car but somehow managed to keep my bike, a 1982 Harley Wide Glide. Had to completely start over.
    Luckily, met a wonderful girl and have been married to her for 21 years now and never a problem.
    Good luck.

  8. THUNDER160
    #

    I lost two houses two corvettes, and a bad a$$ boat, But life goes on ,I found a good one now, and Life Is Great.....

  9. retzdarraiter
    #

    dude, you ride a motorcycle. pick up a firm ripe 18 yr. old, get laid, things will become much clearer and happier!!

    go on now. git er done!

  10. SdeweinFL
    #

    Dude, as Mikey said, "Been there, lost the T-Shirt." I got to the point where I was ready to take the advice of an old comedian: "I'm gonna quit dating and quit getting married. I'll save time, find some chick I hate, and just give her a house."

    I know it hurts really bad, and is depressing as it gets - I'm sure you feel lower than whale poop; but things will get better. Stick with your friends and try to find stuff to laugh about.

    Good Luck!

  11. micg10
    #

    i have been with my wife for 23 years and still happy, not sure how i would react if it was me. i do hope everything works out for you.
    keep riding!

  12. zliter
    #

    Sorry to hear you are having to go through this. I was married 24 years and when I was not able to work my wife started fooling around with my best friend. She left because she said she needed someone who could work.
    I got stuck with a house payment and 2 dogs and a cat that just had kittens. No income and the bills she said she paid were not. I got lucky and found someone to buy the house for what was owed on it, 14 years if equity down the toilet but it saved my credit.
    Hopefully you can get out from under the house and get a fresh start.

    By the way Karma is pretty cool. My ex got with a guy and married him and a few months later he became disabled. Every one I know (including her family) says she traded down and the woman I am with now every one says I traded up. They are all right, my gf is a lot younger than my ex and a lot prettier too, plus she has her head on straight. Couldn't be happier, well okay if I won a million bucks I might be a bit happier. lol

    Hang in there, it will get better.

  13. 4mrAkankmpr
    #

    I saw this kind of thing over 20 years ago while I was in the Navy. Also graduated from an upper class (wealthy) high school where I came under the impression that the girl would stay until the money ran out and then vamoose. Being the oldest of seven children with both parents working led to me basicly raising my 'family' while I was growing up. After the Navy (@14yrs) I lived w/ my parents until I could find a job (didn't pay all that much) until they aged to the point that I was caring for them. Dad died physically in '01, had to put my Mom in a nursing home last year, so finally I have a life of my own (such as it is). When I hear stories like yours it assures me that I'm not missing out on all that much. You'll rebound since you have the experience that I don't. I'm probably going to end up what my senior yearbook nominated me as-Professional Hermit!

  14. tunc
    #

    hope it works out for ya
    and dont say ya dont know where to start in the dating game and ya old lol
    sounds like the world is a small place cause it happens here as well downunder
    the 1st i ended up with zip
    so as stated in the other posts ya go ahead in leaps and bounds from now and all is good
    positive attitude and go for it

  15. vakonman
    #

    Hey Tacgtriwer,
    Sorry to hear of your plight man - but I gotta' tell you that it's better now than later. This shows you the character of you ex so you are lucky to be done with her now while you are still young. She would have pulled this act in time anyway.
    Once the pain and shock subsides you will pick yourself up and find a better life. Being hurt and loosing possessions can cause you anger but remember that you are on the high road here. Just as her actions and deceit will cause her to experience negative karma, if you stick to the high road you will experience good karma and you will learn and grow from the anguish. The universe misses nothing and karma is the universes way of making things right here in earth. You will be better off for it. She will have to learn the same lesson as you but in a more painful way.
    I know it's difficult to remain on the high road when you've been "done wrong". Your ego will want to defend what it feels is it's - but let it go man. Stuff can be replaced in time and your heart will heal and you will be better off. Don't seek revenge in any way because that will draw bad karma to you. Be true to yourself, take time to heal and you will come out on top.
    Trust what I say - I'm speaking from more than one experience that you are living now. We're with you brother.

  16. SdeweinFL
    #

    Oh yeah, don't forget that while time heals all wounds, it also wounds all heels.

  17. 13oSc
    #

    Maybe get some counseling with her before you move on-you DO have some ownership in her "descisions or indecretions". Takes 2 to tango.
    It could be good to learn what you did or didn't do that pushed or made her want to jump into another's arms...maybe keep it from happening again/next time?
    If it all does go South think of the money you'll save on real estate taxes by renting.

  18. DJinNH594
    #

    This weekend I found my long term GF screwing around. I ended it. Now Im going to lose my house. No way in the world to do the math to afford that on a single income. I have to get an APT., start everything fresh. This sucks. Come to find out I was such a generous guy that I bought her BF a cell phone on my account. I hope that this is all the deeper the lies go. Now, at age 41, I have to reenter a dating scene that I have not thought about for 20 years. This feels clumsy as hell.

    Life goes on, just remember that.

    One of my brothers was balancing watching his two sons while working his own fulltime job. Meanwhile his wife was off going to school for two years to advance her nurnsing career and hooking up with some classmate. This will only be his first divorce. He's such a novice.

    I've had three, the last two were them cheating while I was working nights and out of town. The most recent left with a boyfriend while I was laid up in the hospital for three months after a bad accident at work.

    Our youngest brother already has two divorces under his belt because as his wives weren't exactly honest.

    As I said...life goes on.

    Good luck and just keep going.

    Don (I'm 45. Been there, done that)

  19. DJinNH594
    #

    Tacgtriwer...will ya do me a favor? Try to keep your head clear enough that you don't get injured riding on your bike thinking about her.

    I went to work after getting an email from that last wife about how she was staying with her new boyfriend...I was so full of thoughts about my failed marriage that I didn't pay attention with what I was doing at work. I managed to get myself run over by the 17,000 lb Black Hawk helicopter I was riding in. I lowered my leg right into the path of the landing gear (the a/c was being towed backwards). Had my head been clear, I never would have been so stupid.

    What I'm trying to say is, don't go blowing a red light on your bike, or car for that matter, because your mind is elsewhere.

    Don

  20. zhovman
    #

    Sorry thangs went south on you but like everyone else has said, it gets better with time. Just keep yourself occupied doing whatever when you are not on the bike. Do not think you have to "rush" to get back into the dating game as rebound romances rarely work out either. I tried the councilling bit with my last ex (2nd of 3) and it was a waste of time as far as saving the marriage went but it did help me figure out just what I wanted to avoid if there was to be a next time around (which after 15 years of being single again, there was). One of the last sessions I attended back then, the councilor came right out as soon as I walked in and told me my marriage was over, go get a lawyer, get it over with, get on with my life. I took his advice and wasn't charged for the session. But I did get a bit of revenge on the ex. She left her Cockatoo with me for 3 months. I spent hours every day teaching that bird to just say one phrase. "Someones a Bitch". Never would say it for me though. Ex finally came and got her Bird, took it to her Mothers, a week later my phone rang at 3AM, and I could hear the bird in the background loudly saying "Someones a Bitch". I nearly wet myself laughing as I hung up the phone.

12

Reply »

You must log in to post.